Bittersweet

Dear Zadie,

Yesterday was a very momentous day in history and I want you to be able to read about this night in your early life when you get older. Barack Obama became the very first African-American to be elected president. Your two moms voted for Barack and cried tears of joy during his acceptance speech. You, on the other hand, slept your way through his speech. We don't have a television, so we went over to your Great-Aunt Susie's house to watch the speech and we're really glad we got to witness such a special occasion.

But the other side of this story is that Prop 8 passed, which means that California has amended the state constitution to define marriage as only between a man and a woman. Your two moms worked very hard (though certainly not hard enough!) to help defeat this proposition. The process of working on this campaign was very difficult and the aftermath is even harder. I'm just going to copy and paste an email that I sent out to our family (who were very loving and supportive!) so that you can now a little bit about what was going in your parents' lives during this time.

well, today is a very bittersweet day for us. we are discouraged and demoralized about the passage of prop 8. i knew it was going to be close and i was less optimistic than many of our friends who live in gay bubbles (el segundo kept any optimism in check!), but i'm shocked that 52% of california, the most progressive state in the nation, voted to amend the constitution in this way. the worst part is that the polling about six weeks ago had our side about 17 points ahead, which slipped to 4 points a week before the election. there's no doubt about the fact that television ads telling voters that their children will be taught about gay marriage in school were a deciding factor. i most definitely respect people's opinion that marriage should be between a man and a woman, but i wish they could understand the distinction between a religious marriage sanctioned by a church and a civil marriage approved by the state. i would have loved to have had the opportunity to show concerned voters that my marriage does not threaten anyone else's marriage. and, of course, i wish that all the kids who are raised by gay parents could grow up without feeling that their parents are less than equal under the law.

but today is bittersweet because if anybody can make you feel hopeful about how america can change, and how things that seemed impossible suddenly become possible, obama is certainly the man. we watched his acceptance speech last night and loved seeing the huge throngs of people who were celebrating such an historic occasion. dana, i'm sure it was amazing to be in times square. we probably should have gone somewhere where they were celebrating because we could have used the energy boost.

so, although we're very disappointed, we're trying to look on the positive side and hope that better things are in store for our future. also, we both know from experience living overseas that we are lucky to live in a country where we actually have the freedom to live openly as a couple and raise our daughter. so that's certainly no small consolation.